I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
