the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Randomize
