its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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