So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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