Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
