Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Randomize
