Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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