problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Randomize
