I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
