That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Girls should come with a carfax report
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
