Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
