Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Randomize
