Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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