Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
