i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
