Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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