So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
You left your phone here
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