The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
