just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Don't make out with my wife yet
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
