i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize