oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I'm sobbing to NWA
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize