It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Can Purell be used as lube?
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
