Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Randomize
