the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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