I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
