You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Randomize
