Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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