I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
