We're like a lot better than the average bears
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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