things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
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