I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
