Ambien. No doubt about it.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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