remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Randomize
