Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
