we're blogging at a bar
what day is it and did you see me today?
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
