dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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