operation have a gay friend backfired
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
