you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
