Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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