Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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