the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
