I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
