Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize