idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
It was confusing and full of hummus
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Randomize
