you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
