Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
