Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
