You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
