I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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