So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
